My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
