Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
