ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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