i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
