we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
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