Kiss
Puke
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
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