you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Randomize
