I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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