I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Randomize
