And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize