We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Randomize
