hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
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