have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Randomize
