Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
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