I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
