Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize
