I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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