I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Randomize
