It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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