i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
I have so many feelings about this burrito
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
Randomize
