walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
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