; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize
