Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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