i'm signing you up for texting rehab
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Randomize