you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
