I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize
