quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
