Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Randomize
