oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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