but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
You were trust falling into bushes
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
