I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Randomize
