Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize
