..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Randomize
