Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
literally had 100 drinks last night.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
