Bridesmaid dress fitting. I look like a Weeble and Michelle looks like Malibu Barbie. I have to keep reminding myself that she has herpes so really, the playing field is more level than it might initially seem.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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