btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Randomize
