Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
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