3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
she told me i tasted like america
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
