I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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