we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
