i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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