I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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