Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Randomize
