Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
Randomize
