How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Randomize
