Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
there's paper in my vomit.
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
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