shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize