THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
