Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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