Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
