remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
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